Check List= Completely Nonentertaining Post.

So I've got a cold. yuck. it's not the best timing seeing how I will be driving home super early Wednesday morning. Which means I will be home sometime in the middle of the night. My mom thinks I won't be home till Friday at some point... so I'll be quite the Christmas surprise!

This cold has thrown me off. I couldn't fall asleep last night so finally at 6 AM I took some benadryl and was obviously delirious from not sleeping because in my right mind I know that's a bad choice. So I slept until away most of the day. And apparently, now I'm blogging away the rest of it.

Seriously, I don't know why I'm on here.

clean room.
clean bathroom.
do laundry.
pack.
get Huck roadtrip ready.
make roadtrip CDs.
make christmas presents.
drop clothes off at the donation center.
oh and plan a wedding.


I'm excited to see my little nieces and nephews. I need a nap.

The weather is incredible. Straight up Portland weather today. Why don't I live there? One day.

The Drummer Boy is my least favorite Christmas song. Hands down. And then Feliz Navidad. And Feliz Navidad sung by Celine Dion? Hello. She's Canadian. It makes my ears bleed. But for some reason I still sing along... and then the lady sitting across the couch from me at a coffee shop looks at me like I'm crazy. Now it's Jingle Bells. But sung by dogs. Like they're barking Jingle Bells.

Get me out of here!

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I'm finally home. drinking wine, baking cookies, watching Grey's Anatomy and looking up really awesome houses on Craigslist. Houses where? Tulsa. It's official. I'm moving back to Tulsa sometime around May. Maybe sooner. But definitely not later.

Here's the thing- I want to be a cool Aunt. Not the Aunt that comes home for the Holidays. And not the Aunt who sends you birthday money in a card. I want to be there-- for all things, good and bad. At least for a little bit. So, Homeward bound!How could you not be around to see this messy brownie face? See what I mean?

Speaking of homeward bound, I'll be home for Christmas by next Friday. Until then I've got finals, wedding planning, Christmas present making, and lots of haircuts to do!

yippee.

• My dog likes to sit as close as he possibly can to me and lay his head on my computer as I type. Cute, but invasive and somewhat handicapping.

See what I mean? Cute. Invasive. Handicapping.

• I've realized I'm a selfish friend. I don't like to share my friends with other people. This is obviously wrong. God is showing me some dark parts of my heart. I asked Him to so I'm glad He's following through. It's all a part of the refining process, I guess. Speaking of refining, I read through old blog posts from 3-4 years ago... man, oh man. It's crazy how much one changes over such a short time. But I'm so glad I did. so glad.

• I seemed so optimistic then. I feel much more realistic now. And sometimes reality is optimistic. Just not always. This probably isn't making sense to you and that's ok. I'm still processing all of this.

• It's crazy how one can be a product of another person. I guess that's what rabbis did/do. I just need to do a better job at choosing a rabbi. That sounds harsh and ungrateful. and I'm not. at all. again, still processing.

• I love the weather right now. The high is in the upper 60s all week. Winter has hit. SELAH.

• I miss sitting at the table with these faces.

I Really Can't Stay, Baby It's Cold Outside!

I'm sitting in my creative writing class and I'm suppose to be doing research, but since I've already done it I'm blogging.

I'm excited about Thanksgiving. Since I've lived in Tucson I've never been excited about this holiday. The first year was hard because it was my first Holiday away from my family. And my family actually loves each other so I like spending time with them. And the second year was my first holiday since my dad had died and that was, of course, hard. But this year I feel like I've settled down in Tucson and it finally feels like home. And although holidays will probably always be hard without my Dad here with me, I've come to terms with the fact that he isn't here anymore. So all that to say, I'm excited about Thanksgiving. I love cooking yummy food while listening to Christmas music and getting together with wonderful friends and drinking wine.

Anyway, I'm trying to think of creative, unorthodox thanksgiving recipes... so if you have any, share the wealth.

alright, class is over.

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I'm watching Elf. This is probably my all-time favorite Christmas movie now. Probably. I'm not good at picking favorites.

My small group is having thanksgiving dinner tomorrow night and for some reason I got assigned stuffing. Anyone can make stuffing. Oh well. I'm actually kinda relieved. Nikki told me this recipe that has sage flavored sausage mixed with celery, onion and then the Stove Top stuffing. I don't know what it will taste like, but she says its pretty great.

today was my friend Steve's birthday and we threw a surprise party for him. I was the one who had to pretend we were doing something else and show up with him. He was so surprised. I don't think I've ever had a successful surprise party for anyone.

I really love my church.

I Made it Through the Wilderness

Last night I had a dream that the area behind my headboard and underneath my bed caught on fire. I put it out but not quiet in time. My walls got all black, my new bedding(which, sadly, only exists in my dreams...) was ruined and my dog burned his face. It was sad. And my dog talked to me(in English) in this dream. So weird. I'm pretty sure the fact that I've left my curling iron on for the past two day has caused the dream. Two nights ago I woke up in the middle of the night and my room reeked like burning plastic. I checked my curling iron and found a plastic bag melted all over it. sigh... I need to be more responsible or I'm going to burn my house down.





Kelsi is getting married in like 7 weeks. It's crunch time. The majority of my free time is consumed with this wedding. Which I'm ok with... it's just feeling a little insane. I love it though... it's been fun.

I think winter is finally going to hit here in Tucson. Last week-- highs in the mid 90s. This week-- low 70s. Heck ya!

God is teaching me a lot right now. I feel like I'm eating my words from about 6 months ago. That's good though. I want to be progressing and changing.

I miss photography. And I want to learn to make pottery. I've always said this... but I want to really do it.

I learned tons of self-defense moves last night. A friend of mine is a sheriff.... he's super intense and way cool. He's from Oklahoma(ya don't say) and we were instant buddies. He wants to taze me just so I know what it feels like. I think he's insane if he thinks I'll ever let him do that. Kelsi wants to. She's also an idiot. Between him and my friend who's a black belt, I'm going to acquire quite the skills.

What Was I Thinking?

I'm taking 2 and 1/2 online classes. My sociology class is half in class, half online. Hence the 1/2.
I think these online classes are going to be the death of me. But that's ok. I can do it.... right? Some psychology class I'm taking literally might kill me. I'm going to have to be so disciplined for that one. But I can do it.

OK. That was my rant. I'm finished.
Cookies are done. People are finished.
That's what my English-teaching mother told me growing up. So now I say it to myself every time I have to choose between finished or done.
I also sing that Gwen Stefani song every time I spell bananas.

I had a dream about my best friend Kelsi, who is getting married in January. I'm her maid of honor. I dreamed that I couldn't find the right shoes to match my dress. All I needed was black, peep toe, kitten-heals. And I couldn't fit my horse feet into any of them. So Grandma gave me shoes to wear(here we go). They were bright purple with sequins and yellow knitted flowers on them. Grandma loved them(of course she did). And I didn't tell Kelsi about them and just hoped she didn't notice as I walked down the aisle. But she did. And she never spoke to me again.

Then I had a dream Shannon(who's one year anniversary is the same date as my friend, kelsi's wedding) was redoing her ceremony on her anniversary. Which means I had two weddings simultaneously. But shannon wanted me to take the photos for her wedding. Which would never happen in real life because her brother is a phenomenal photographer. But, nevertheless, she did. She game me this camera and yelled at me and told me I "HAD TO TAKE ALL PICTURES WITH THIS CAMERA!" so, I was super nervous. Well, come to find out, the camera Shannon gave me had no film in it. So, none of her pictures showed up. Obviously. And then she never talked to me again.

So I have two brides that I love dearly who had their ceremonies on the same day who never want to talk to me again. It's a horrible feeling to wake up to.

I wonder what all that means? Maybe I just feel like there's a lot of pressure(self-inflicted) to make Kelsi's wedding perfect. And maybe, just maybe, I feel like I might let her down. Even though I know I wouldn't... I would just be letting myself down.

This is all so silly.

I now have to go sit in algebra for 4 hours. I'm less than thrilled.

Killer Monkies, Carl Marx and Disease Infested Birds

I had a super crazy dream yesterday. My roommate, Julia, got eaten by wild monkeys. It was so graphic. I don't think I've ever had a scary dream that graphic before. I want to stop thinking about it.

School is crazy. This is my final week for some of my classes and then I have a few new ones starting up the following week. I have a massive paper due in soc over Marxism. Extremely interesting... yet complicated. Marx is easier to understand when you've had a couple glasses of wine, that's for sure.

I start my classes this week to become a long term volunteer at Crisis Pregnancy Center. I get to sit and talk with women who are debating whether to keep their child or not. And women who recently had miscarriages. I'm really pumped about this. I do wish the classes would start the following week with finals and such this week... but it's ok. I'll manage.

I'm going to the ostrich farm this week with my new friend, Krystal. She's from Louisiana. Her southern personality is refreshing. The ostrich farm is the best $5 ever spent. Those things are vicious... yet extremely entertaining. At the farm, there's this bird room(I hate birds) where you go in there with a little container of nectar and you just hold it and all these birds swarm to you. It's disgusting. I always take people there when they come to visit me. Last time Taylor and Kacy were here I took them and they loved it. Taylor kinda freaked in the bird room, rightfully so, but Kacy loved it. But she's a huge animal person. ick.
The man that owns the ostrich farm is this huge redneck and he's from Oklahoma(shocker) and he went in the bird room with me. When I walked in there, I was immediately covered in birds so, by instinct, I buried my head in my chest. He starts pulling on my chin trying to pull my head up but I won't budge. So he yells at me, "Girl! what are ya gunna do when you got a reeeaaall problem?!" And I said, "This is a real problem!"

Hello. Covered in birds= problem.

So it goes without saying: the ostrich farm produces fantastic entertainment 100% of the time.

I need sleep. Good night.